ghostharasser | Open Post

Saw lotsa monster bouncers.

[ Kind of a cliche, obvious choice, but not one Stan could argue with. Even he thought twice about cheating the first time he saw a hulking, irritated troll standing outside a poorly lit dive bar (not that it had actually stopped him). ]

Guess there's lots of monster charity here, too?

[ Well, who cares. Two hours is a bit of a hike, but that's not too bad - he's had to walk further to get groceries when the Stanleymobile broke down. 'Acquiring' a car to make the trip a little shorter does occur to him but... meh. Sounds like a pain. ]

Well, let's get going then.

Monster charity? What, so we have to get turned into some hideous creature before this place will give us a hand? Lame.

[That hasn’t exactly left his mind, this monster business, but it feels far enough away (and surreal as hell) that he hasn’t been dwelling on it very hard. It does ...give him a passing thought that makes him pause.]

I wonder how hard it would be to fake being a monster.

[Wow, that is the most Stan-like thought he has had yet, and it kind of startles him. Well, he’ll have time later to feel bad about all the sketchy shit they’ve gotten up to when they have a roof over their heads and actual food to eat.]

Edited 2020-09-11 00:27 (UTC)

[ ... Heh heh. ]

You made a pretty convincing wolf boy.

[ He never did figure out where that costumes got to, come to think of it, though the shredder getting jammed with dog hair gave him some ideas. ]

But I dunno if the people here are dumb enough for that. They seem a little more wary than the folks back home.

[Oh god. The wolf boy costume.]

Oh, right. I repressed that memory.

[He’s not even remotely sorry about it ending up in the paper shredder. That’s what Stan gets.]

You’ve got a point. I don’t know if I’d call them smarter, but they really seemed more inclined to start angry mobs than people back home.

[Well, it’s off they go. It really sucks they don’t have a car they can just take, or the money for a cab. At least this kind of hike isn’t the worst Dipper has had to make. He worries a little about Stan, but he knows better than to say anything until he’s literally keeling over.]

[ Stan hasn't been having any trouble with the rough living, at least. He's still, you know, old and overweight and dealing with forty-odd years of not taking great care of himself, but he's in the best shape he's been in years. Turns out even just standing and walking on a boat takes effort, and Ford refuses to let them live off bacon and junk food. ]

Yeah, exactly. Plus there's not a bunch of whackjobs in bathrobes erasing everyone's memories.

[ Stan doesn't mind them too much - they never bothered him any, and without their gun Bill couldn't have been stopped - but they were undeniably weird. ]

But hey, if it makes 'em wary about kicking us out, I'll take it.

[Honestly, He’s seen Stan take down a Zombie hoard with his bare hands. He doesn’t worry that much, but he does want to make sure he doesn’t over do it when they have zero access to medical help.]

Haha, yeah... Those guys...

[Wait.]

I don’t think we ever told you about them. How did you—

[Is this something else Stan’s known about the whole time?]

Ford.

[ Stan had known a lot of things about Gravity Falls that he hadn't let on, by the Society of the Blind Eye wasn't one of them. ]

He got real bent out of shape when I asked him why he made a memory-erasing gun, and even angrier when I compared it to that tie of his.

[ Stan looks a little smug as he relates the story. Eventually Ford had realized Stan was just winding him up, but not before he'd ranted a bit first. ]

Guess it makes sense, though. Always thought it was weird everyone acted like McGucket was crazy when he started yelling about that Gobblewhatchit.

[ A boring old lake monster was nothing compared to some of the stuff Stan had seen. ]

[Dipper is about to pipe up with a “WELL, ACTUALLY-“ about the inventor of that gun, when it becomes clear to him that Stan knew and was absolutely menacing Ford about it on purpose. Instead he sighs and rolls his eyes, but fondly. It’s really not that different from when Mabel purposely gets him going and then laughs about it. Annoying, but somehow endearing. Though, he suspects Ford did not take it near as gracefully.]

The Gobblewonker- which, of all things in Gravity Falls, turned out to be an actual hoax! McGucket made that robot!

[Which- honestly Stan probably could have guessed since it got worked into their Mystery Shack Mech.]

[ Neither Ford nor Stan can take anything even half as gracefully as Dipper and Mabel. Needless to say, Ford have been positively incensed over the teasing (for about ten minutes). ]

Some dumb fish monster's pretty normal by that town's standards. You ever run into any campfires with legs out there? Those are weird.

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