ghostharasser | Open Post

[Dipper gives Stan such a funny look at that, but he’s far too invested now to stop, so he keeps on his search. It’s bothering him now, so he needs to know. Also its a really bad smell? So, he should get rid of whatever it is or it’ll drive him nuts.]

[Stan will be rewarded by watching Dipper sniff all over the room before he figures out how to hone that sense and follow the trail, which finally leads him too...]

[His dirty laundry.]

[The noise he makes once he realizes this is the single most offended noise Stan has heard Dipper make, and seeing how Dipper makes offended noises at many things, this is pretty impressive.]

Are you serious, is that what that really smells like?!

[Hold on a second - Stan's too busy laughing to answer. After a few seconds, he wipes a tear from his eye and stifles the last of his chuckles.]

We've only been trying to tell you all summer! Well-- Mabel more than me, but still!

[What was Stan going to do, say "Actually your dirty laundry reeks twice as much for me, your Werewolf Grunkle Stan!"? It was never going to happen. Better to just pretend it was a normal amount of stinky.]

[Dipper feels like his entire reality came come crashing down around him. Not because of the life-changing werewolf problem, and not because he’s realized just how bad he’s smelled this whole time, but because he has senses now that won’t let him ignore it. He’s furious.]

[Dipper grabs his laundry basket, gives Stan the biggest stink-eye, and then heads right out the door with it. No, this gets fixed now.]

[His first act as a werewolf is to do his laundry. Incredible.]

[Stan doesn't follow right away, but once Dipper's out the door he gets up and listens down the stairs for Mabel's inevitable reaction to the laundry.

She absolutely does not disappoint, and Stan's in stitches again for the second time in the last two minutes. Dipper can probably hear him. Honestly, that isn't even the wolf powers - he's laughing hard enough that Mabel can hear him too.

Once he's got it out of his system he heads downstairs after Dipper. That's probably enough laughing for now, maybe. Kid's still got werewolf ropes to learn and all that.]

Edited 2020-11-22 06:39 (UTC)

[Yeah, yeah, yuck it up. He’s not even going to argue that he doesn’t deserve some of that, after this hideous discovery. Mabel’s reaction is exactly what he expected, and she hollers and hassles him all the way down to the utility room.]

[They actually have a decent conversation while they’re in there, though, free of Stan’s echoing laughter from above. Mabel helps him get the load started and then lets him borrow one of her sweaters after he discovers that his shirt is in just as bad of shape as the rest of his laundry.]

[She asks him about his injuries, and he shows her the healing scars. She yells at him about scaring her and they share a hug while Dipper apologizes.]

[They’ll eventually head out to the kitchen where Dipper’s stomach loudly informs possibly the entire town of Gravity Falls that he is starving.]

[Stan's actually already in the kitchen when they get there, rummaging through the fridge. They haven't had dinner yet, and also Dipper hasn't eaten in almost two days so...yeah, he should probably feed the kids.

He is also, thankfully, done laughing. Maybe he'll snicker a little later when Dipper goes to switch the laundry over, but he's good for now.]

Since you just got up, how's about breakfast for dinner?

[It's a good cheap way to feed Dipper a bunch of red meat, and Mabel's never going to say no to pancakes for dinner.]

[Mabel immediately starts cheering, because yes, obviously she is not going to say no to pancakes for dinner. Dipper lights up, similarly, though his cheering is a little more subdued. He’s understandably a little tired, and kind of dealing with a lot! Still, that doesn’t stop him from scampering into his chair with his twin as they start pounding on the table chanting.]

Pancakes for dinner! Pancakes for dinner! Pancakes for dinner!

[That’s at least incredibly normal. Dipper seems to be taking things at least moderately well. For now.

[For a half a second, everything feels normal. The kids harassing Stan, Stan being a questionable guardian feeding them breakfast for dinner - this could be any normal day, really.

And that's a good thing. It's a stark difference from the first few months Stan was a werewolf, and that's honestly the best he could do for Dipper. Plus it keeps things sort of ordinary for Mabel too.]

Yeah, yeah, hold your horses! Chanting isn't gonna get you your Stancakes faster.

[Not that he actually minds.

Soon enough, there's three platters on the table to serve from. He's made a large stack of pancakes, plus plenty of bacon and a big bowl of "scrambled meat". It's not the classiest breakfast out there, but it's also real hard to mess up breakfast food.]

[It’s not the classiest but its absolutely what both twins are ecstatic for. Mabel doesn’t waste any time grabbing for her pancakes and then absolutely drowning them in syrup.]

[Dipper lets her do that and instead goes for the bowl of scrambled meat. Having to sit there and wait for it to cook was frankly agonizing, and he was antsy practically the whole time while Mabel did various things to distract him. Getting used to his senses was going to be an adventure for sure.]

[It’s probably of no surprise that he dumps half the bowl of meat onto his plate and then immediately reaches for the bacon next. The pancakes are an afterthought, and when he realizes he doesn’t have space for them he decides maybe he’ll go for them later. Or just let Mabel have them all.]

[It’s a blissful quiet while both of them eat. Dipper can’t think of a single time in his life that he’s ever been so hungry, so he eats like he’s starved. Once he’s finished most of his plate he slows down and takes a breath or two, leaning back in his chair. He sits there in thoughtful silence for a moment before he looks over at Stan.]

I still have questions.

[Stan, being older and more used to the whole werewolf thing, is more composed around meat. He's had decades of practice forcing himself to have some amount of restraint. It smells fantastic, but his plate is more balanced with a little of everything. No amount of lycanthropy will get rid of his sweet tooth.

He can't say he's surprised that Dipper has more questions, but with an opening like that he has no idea which ones Dipper's going to ask. More about being a werewolf? About himself?

Either way, it's better to let the kid ask - it means he doesn't have to volunteer as much, and he's got no idea where he would even start.]

More questions, huh? Alright, hit me.

[It’s kind of weird that Stan isn’t trying to deflect, even if it’s ...well. It would be pretty shitty to be cagey about things like how to be a werewolf but he’s used to Stan being cagey about a lot of things. Like his tattoo.]

[He gives it some thought and passes a glance to Mabel. She had told him in the laundry room that she’d been filled in on basically everything, but he doesn’t know what that exactly means. Either way, he decides its best to have this conversation with her here, because if he trusts anyone with these kinds of secrets, its Mabel.]

...I’ve read a lot of books and seen a lot of movies. How much of it’s made up and how much is real? Am I allergic to silver now? Do I just have to worry about full moons? What do I need to know.

[Stan wiggles his hand.]

Eh, probably about fifty-fifty depending what you've seen. Silver burns, but that's pretty much only gonna be a problem if some weirdo actually shoots you with a silver bullet - half the things people say are silver aren't, so it's pretty good for figuring out if somebody's scamming you.

[Which is the only reason Stan's ever had to think about the whole silver thing, to be totally honest.]

For everything else, it waxes and wanes - pun intended. Y'know how the moon controls ocean tides? It's kinda like that, except it's your whole body. It takes some getting used to, but basically around the full moon you're gonna feel like absolute garbage. You can't possibly miss that the full moon is coming, 'cause you're gonna feel like death warmed over. But then by the time new moon rolls around you're gonna feel more like yourself. It kinda...tugs and pulls on you, I guess? Either way, you're not gonna be one of those werewolves that can just rip off their shirt and turn whenever they want. That's never been real.

[Mabel cries out in disappointment where she's sitting - "Is EVERYTHING I love a lie?!" Stan ignores her.]

Full moon's obviously the big one. You're gonna turn, and it's-- it ain't great. It hurts like hell and then you just sorta black out 'til the morning. You always gotta make sure you're somewhere safe where you can't get at anybody, cause there's no knowing what the wolf did or didn't do.

[Dipper laments that he did not bring one of his notebooks downstairs with him. He’ll just have to pay close attention and write it all down later.]

[He frowns in thought as Stan talks. Some of it is stuff he knows about, some of it really isn’t. The stuff about the moon phases making you feel terrible is new and sounds incredibly unpleasant, so he makes a note to keep an eye on that.]

[When he gets to the last part, the part that Dipper was the most nervous to learn about, the dread drops in his stomach and he feels a very uncomfortable chill under his skin. A painful transformation and a total blackout. Not unheard of, but basically the worst case scenario in most werewolf lore. Great.]

[He takes a deep breath for a moment, trying not to seem like that had rattled him before he speaks up. His voice waver only a little bit.]

So, there’s no control over it, then. Where ...um. Where do you usually go? If that’s the case.

...No, there isn't.

[The admission is heavy, and probably far from what Dipper wants to hear. There's no getting around it though - not anymore. Not now that he's been bit.

A quiet falls over the table, and Stan hesitates at the question. He's been thinking about it constantly since they found Dipper, since it became apparent what he would become. Still, he can't make the words at first. Where the hell does he even begin?]

Tell you what. Once you kids finish eating, I'll show you! Trust me, you're never gonna believe it if I just say it. Besides, you always like a good mystery, right?

[Stan winks!]

I can tell you my spot's pretty good though, especially if it had you two fooled.

[It isn’t what he wants to hear at all, and he can already feel that part of him that wants to just coil up in anxiety and scream, but he’d much rather have the truth then for Stan to sugarcoat it. If he knows what to expect, then he can make a plan.]

[The rest that Stan says, has him looking up at his uncle in what’s outright confusion. What ...a weird answer to that question! He’s almost kind of taken aback by it.]

[But Stan does have a point. He does like a good mystery, and he can already feel the overwhelming curiosity start to well up.]

No kidding. I- yeah. Okay, I can’t wait.

[And he’ll nudge at Mabel, who nudges at him back because frankly how dare he try to rush her through her pancakes. He will go back to eating, and finish up very quickly, and then just stare at Mabel until she groans and also hurries.]

[If he had a tail, clearly it would be wagging.]

[Stan can't help laughing as he watches the two of them. At least he can make this fun - or try his best, at least.

When the two of them finish up, Stan clears the table and then decides to stop and wash the small amount of dishes they made. It's a five minute job, but a five minute job he has literally never done immediately after a meal the entire time they've been there. It's a five minute job he's probably literally never done after a meal ever.]

So, you kids got any guesses? I didn't leave the Shack, so I've gotta hide somewhere around here, right?

[Mabel looks like her brain itches a little bit, and then she gasps and goes starry-eyed. "PUPPY CRATE! A REALLY big puppy crate!"]

[Why is he washing the dishes. Stan has never stopped and washed the dishes right after breakfast. Are you kidding him, right now? Is he stalling?]

[Dipper starts to tap on the table with his fingers both impatient and antsy at the same time.]

The shack is full of hidden rooms, isn’t it? Didn’t we find an entire abandoned parlor once?

Oh yeah! The one I locked those creepy wax guys in because they kept coming alive and messing with me at night.

[Everything is different now, reframed, but Stan still tries to keep it light. The truth of the matter is that once he figured out their transformation was caused by moon cycles, he made the executive decision to make them disappear. Lock them away, so they can't hurt anyone.

...And then he let them out because the kids found them and what was he supposed to do? Admit the supernatural was real? Pfft.]

There's a few of those around here, but this one...

[Stan puts the last plate away and drops the dishrag on the counter.]

This one's the granddaddy of them all. Ready to go?

You knew about the-!! [Dipper cuts off because as incredulous as he is, he isn’t actually that surprised, and the fact that he didn’t catch that sooner is something he is kicking himself for. Of course, he knew.]

[Everything Is Different Now.]

[Anyway, some of his frustration starts to manifest as wolffish and his voice has juuuust a little undercurrent of a growl.]

I’ve been ready for like twenty minutes! This had better be as cool as you’re making it out to be.

Alright, alright! I promise, it's even cooler than whatever you're picturing. C'mon.

[He waves a hand, gesturing for the kids to follow - might as well bring Mabel too. No sense in hiding any of this from her if he's not gonna be hiding it from Dipper.

Perhaps to their surprise, Stan doesn't actually lead them deeper into the house. Instead he turns into the living room, and then through the door that leads into the gift shop. It's closed for the day, but with summer days the way they are early evening has only just started to creep in. It casts an eerie glow over the place.

To add to the drama of the moment, Stan doesn't turn on the lights.]

Both of you, turn around and look over there. [Stan gestures vaguely at the gift shop door.] And no peeking!

[Once they turn away, Stan starts punching a code into the vending machine. Just because he's showing them the basement doesn't mean he wants them knowing the code to get down there whenever they feel like it.]

[The both follow him quietly all the way to the gift shop, occasionally sharing curious and confused glances. Once they get to the vending machine, Dipper raises an eyebrow but he complies. He stuffs his hands in his pockets with a frown.]

If you wanted to grab a snack you could have just said something.

[Because, Dipper honestly doesn’t know where this is going besides the very real possibility of Stan just fucking with them. For all he knows, Stan’s grabbing some jerky and then he’s going to lead them to a secret room on the other side of the house.]

I'm not getting a snack.

[Honestly if he was he wouldn't bother punching the codes in at all - he'd just open the machine and take it.

There are five distinct button presses, and then...stranger sounds happen. The sound of something pressurized releasing. The creak of a heavy metal door swinging slowly open. A heavy sigh from Stan.]

Okay. ...You can turn around.

[And when they do, Stan is standing at the top of a hidden passageway that leads down a set of stairs. He's holding a lantern firmly in hand.]

[Oh whoa, what the heck were those noises. The vending machine definitely didn’t make sounds like that normally. It takes everything he has not to just turn around there but he keeps his word.]

[When the twins both turn around, they’re met with ...something that’s honestly hard to process. It’s a whole freaking secret passage. Behind the vending machine!! This whole time!! They both stand there slack jawed for a few moments before Dipper just kind of sputters.]

Are you- Whoa! Grunkle Stan, what the heck!?

[Even so, he’s already walking towards the stairs. Obviously he wants a closer look. This is the coolest fucking thing every.]

[Mabel bounds forward as well, and Stan smiles but...he seems sort of nervous, and rubs the back of his neck with his hand.]

Heh. ...You don't even know the half of it.

[He steels himself after that, and leans right back into the showmanship as he starts down the stairs.]

Alright, follow me - and shut the vending machine on your way down, would ya? Don't wanna let the air of mystery out!

[The stairs are dimly lit, hence the lantern. When they get to the bottom, Stan's already punched in a code for a secret elevator, and the doors to it open wide. He turns to them as though it's totally normal to have an elevator under your house.]

All board!

[What an ominous thing to say! Dipper tucks that away but doesn’t let it stop his unbridled curiosity as he follows Stan down the stairs. It did seem like Stan was nervous, but he covers it up quickly enough that Dipper shrugs it off.]

[He’s being hammy against, anyway, so clearly things are fine.]

[The get to the elevator and Dipper stops again, astonished silent for the second time in four minutes.]

That’s an elevator! Where even are we now? If you have some kind of secret lab under the Shack, I am going to absolutely lose it.

[He gets in.]

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