ghostharasser | Open Post

[Damn, okay.]

[He's not sure what he was expecting, but it absolutely should have been this. The note self-destructs into smoke and Dipper gives a little startled shout. Then of course he is giving chase into the shack.]

-Hey! Come on!

[throwing open the doors, Dipper pauses, taking the place in. Yeah, it's ...very similar to what it used to be but it would be impossible for him to miss the blue flames. It's always blue flames, isn't it. Concerning.]

[When Stan doesn't have him playing hide and seek, he'd like to take a closer look. Until th-]

Whoa! H-Hey, what are y- Ow! Ow! Okay!

[Dipper let's out a long sigh as he waits, tense, for the Stan Crab to get cozy before he decides to just fucking accept this and continue on. He has to make a choice about where he's going to start. This place is a labyrinth, which he'd always thought was crazy considering who it belonged to. Now he's a little less surprised.]

[...He looks down the hall of the one he knows he wants to go down the least. He makes a long suffering noise. One of total resignation. Of trepidation. And Horror.]

[He heads to the door with the uncle jokes.]

[The lights are dim in this room, focused on a stage in what looks like a makeshift comedy club. There are little groups of tables for people to sit at, but no one's actually there.

Stan's voice booms in out of absolutely nowhere. He isn't on the stage, but the stage lights move around as if gesturing.]

Alright folks! Starting out strong with a classic! You ready for a real joke? Here goes--

[A cough, then he goes--]

My ex-wife still misses me...BUT HER AIM IS GETTIN' BETTER!

[The lights move in a criss-cross motion, trying to parrot Stan's signature arm motions.]

BUT HER AIM IS GETTIN' BETTER! It's funny because marriage is terrible!

[And then, because it's his mind and he wants it to happen, there's an uproar of laughter - not real laughter, of course, but a half-remembered TV laugh track.]

Thank you, thank you! I'm here forever, 'cause we're in my brain!

[Yep, he hates it as much as he expected.]

Boooooo!

[Right, he's supposed to be looking for Stan. Maybe he will slip back stage to see if there's any clues or hints. Hopefully before anything gets thrown at him for being a wet blanket.]

[There isn't a lot backstage really - it's pretty dim, with ropes to theoretically move the curtain, rigs that don't seem to lead anywhere in particular, and assorted props from different identities he's had in the past. There's also a hanging rack of masks Stan has worn, from literal ones like a monster mask, to disguises and costumes he's worn to run his tourist trap (or run from the law), to weirder things like his goofy cross-eyed face. There's even an accurate mask of Ford's face mixed in, distinguished by his cleft chin and serious demeanor.

The laughter dies down back in Mindscape Comedy Club, and Stan starts up again.]

Yeah, yeah, we get it, I'm a riot! But here's a real joke for ya. So I've got a great nephew, Dipper - kid's backstage right now actually.

[The few lights go out backstage, casting the whole area into darkness.]

Folks, can you believe the kid thinks he's actually gonna find me back there? That it was gonna be that easy?

[Pause for another uproar of sitcom laughter from absolutely no one.]

Kid must have thought I'd "go easy on him" just 'cause it's our first time going toe-to-toe here in my head. HA! Joke's on him though, 'cause I'm not the headlining act tonight--

[Unfortunately for Dipper, the entrances to the backstage area have all suddenly vanished, invisible walls in places he was once able to walk through. Uh oh! Only way out seems to be through the curtain and onto the stage!]

[Oh, that's pretty interesting, though. He ends up a little distracted looking at the masks before he's suddenly plunged into darkness. Oh...]

[Oh no.]

[Dipper can handle a lot of stressful stuff, but nothing quite makes him anxious like the really mundane stuff. Talking to people, deadlines, class assignments from a school he will probably never see again- so, he does realize, with a little dread, just what Stan is pulling on him now.]

[For a few moments he's paralyzed, trying to figure out what to do. If he walks out on stage he knows for a fact he won't be able to tell jokes. He's terrible at jokes!! Will he get laughed at? Booed? He thinks, for a moment, about maybe just bolting off the stage and making a run for it-]

[But then he gets an idea. Right. He's done something like this before.]

[Dipper walks out on stage with a whole lot of fake confidence. He's holding a karaoke machine, which he drops on the stage. His outfit has changed, and he is holding a mic like it's a threat.]

That's right!

[Oops, maybe that was a little too loud. He clears his throat.]

It's me, and I'm doing an entire set of BABBA's greatest hits!

[When Dipper first announces himself, the sitcom track switches from laughter to an "Ooooooo~!" of surprise!

The opening act isn't as thrilled about this - or at least it doesn't seem that way given the melodramatic shouting and the flailing of the spotlights.]

No! Not disco hits! Anything but that!!!

[Meanwhile, the Stan Crab has climbed down off of Dipper and skittered off the stage - not out of stage fright, but to look for something in the dark. Hm...]

Edited 2024-07-30 05:30 (UTC)

[Dipper, fueled by his uncles horror and distress, presses play on the karaoke machine.]

[The opening music for Disco Girl starts to play.]

Saturday night is a night all right-

[He is going to, unless stopped, at least sing the entireyu of Disco Girl right there in front of Stan's salad. He gets into it enough that he doesn't even notice the crab has run off. Not yet, anyway.]

[He isn't immediately stopped, despite Stan's cries and wails of agony. The empty crowd is really enthusiastic actually, screaming and cheering as though they weren't expecting comedy instead of a concert.

In fact, Dipper will even make it all the way through to the chorus! A minor miracle! But as soon he utters the words Disco Girl, there's a sudden creak at his feet as the floor drops out from underneath him - a trap door opens, the type an actor would use to make a sudden exit. If Dipper is quick enough to look, he'll see Stan Crab to the side, holding the end of a comically large lever with both claws.]

[Your booing only makes him stronger Stan. He's happy to get as far into the song as he can, the stock cheering encouraging him actually. Way to send some mixed signals.]

[He does a little twirl with flourish and everything, right as the trap door opens under him.]

[Ah.]

[He sees the crab mere seconds before he plummets into the void. He'll get you, you shitty little crab just you wait. Points to eyes, points to you.]

[Of course the next problem is the fact that he's falling and he doesn't know how far or for how long, so he tries to think of what to do to keep him from hitting the ground too hard. Think...think... he's supposed to be utilizing the mindscape with all this so...]

[So, Dipper sheds his big fluffy coat and holds it above him like a parachute. With some effort that's what it actually becomes, and his fall softens just as he sees the bottom. With a thud, Dipper lands on his feet, to find himself back at the beginning.]

Oh, come on.

[There's a crackling sound somewhere above Dipper as speakers that weren't there before come to life, reminiscent of the ones at the Shack that Stan would use to startle people in to buying more keychains claiming it was "subliminal messaging".]

N̵o͏͢t͏̡ ̕ba̸̴͢d͠͠,̡ ͘͢͏k͢͟i̸͘d͜͠, not bad...

[Wherever Stan is, he's watching and very aware of all that's transpired. Was actually that him in the comedy club? Is THIS actually him? He's not about to show his hand now!]

Gonna have to do better than that if you wanna f̡̨i̸̶n͘͠d̷͟ ̢͘͝͠m̀҉͘e̴̕͠ though. Don't tell me that's the b̢͏e̴̴͡s̕͞t̸́͘ ҉͡y̨͜ò͠u̴̧͞͡'̴̷̡̢v̡è̶̵́̕ ̶̡̀͝ģ̶̕͘͠o̸̧͘t͡?̸͟͝

[The same options are there as before, except now the Comedy Club door is entirely missing - the Room of Masks is closed for business, it seems. There's still the ever-popular hall of memories with its residual flames, the room containing Stan's hopes and dreams, and his locked crate of fears. Or, Dipper is welcome to explore and see if he can find anything that isn't so obvious from the surface. There are many, many staircases after all, that presumably go many places...don't they?]

[Dipper groans a little, but isn't too surprised, he guesses. Stan was definitely going to make this as tricky as possible, probably. That's fine. If he could do this easily he wouldn't need the practice to begin with.]

[He flicks his wrist to banish his Para-jacket, but doesn't bother changing the outfit. He'll keep his confidence skirt for now.]

Hardly!

[Alright, let's try again. He'll pass a few of the obvious doors, hand gliding across the wood grain of hopes and dreams, to giving fears a wide berth. He pauses by the hall of memories, but decides for now he'd like to explore further, taking one of the winding staircases deeper into the shack.]</small.

[The door to hopes and dreams, despite seeming fairly ordinary aside from a bright glow around the edges, will leave glitter on his fingertips when he pulls his hand away.

The staircase he's picked is an interesting one - it spirals, but as Dipper descends the steps grow further and further apart, to the point where he may have to jump from step to step. The further down he goes, the more each step wobbles...and the less his surroundings resemble the Mystery Shack. It's getting dark down there.

There's a skittering sound above him, and if he looks up he'll see a Stan crab (the Stan crab? It's frankly hard to tell) looking down at him, watching his movements. It will become apparent that the Stan crab physically cannot follow where Dipper is going. It's as though there is a flat pane of glass preventing it from heading down the stairs, and when it walks on it there's faint tip-taps of claw against glass.

Noticeably though, it isn't trying to stop him either. Maybe it just wants Dipper to know that where he's going is somewhere he can't follow, and will eventually be somewhere he can't see. ...Or maybe it's just being nosy.]

[Oh, this reminds him a little bit of what it felt like descending into the basement, or perhaps into the bunker. He steps carefully, tries to keep his wits about him (which is a little trickier in the chunky heel boots he's wearing now.)]

[The skitter-tapping causes him to pause. Looking up he ...squints at the Stan Crab. What ...what it stuck? What was going on up there.]

[...]

[Oh, maybe it can't come down here. That's...That's very strange actually. Is there parts of Stan's mind that even manifestations of himself can't venture into? Dipper pauses on the steps to consider the darkness carefully, wondering if he should continue. But ...the curiosity gets the better of him. If Stan really didn't want him down here, he would have ejected him, himself, right? Right.]

[So Dipper continues downward, cautiously, into the dark.]

[Eventually, there's a floor to land on. It never quite reaches pitch black levels of dark, but Dipper may want to conjure himself a light. In other parts of Stan's mind, things have lit themselves up as he walked through them, but not here.

There's a lot of sound coming from directly in front of Dipper though - the creaking turning of knobs, pressure being released from values rhythimcally, and metal clanking. It looks...like a very dark, dusty boiler room, of all things.

Looking around will reveal interesting things - hundreds of little levels and knobs that all move independently, making instant adjustments as needed. One knob labeled SNORING VOLUME cranks up all the way and back down again. HEARTBEAT and BREATHING are constantly moving gauges, but protected behind glass. A small light source in the room is a blue spark from a panel that has been broken off - BODY TEMPERATURE - which makes sense, given Stan's new status as a coldblood that can't feel temperature extremes as well anymore.

There isn't a proper control panel for someone to sit at, but there is a wall full of filing cabinets. Some of the labels have been burnt off from the same fire that still burns upstairs, but others are still clear, or have even been re-labeled with time. BIASES. FLIGHT OR FIGHT. STRESS RESPONSES. NERVOUS TICS. TELLS. GRUDGES. SURVIVAL INSTINCTS. DRIVING. SHOPLIFTING. BLOOD MAGIC.

The list goes on and on like that, with dozens of other drawers full of information on his great uncle's automatic responses.]

Edited 2024-08-05 05:08 (UTC)

[Oh, this place is crazy. He's in like the basement basement of Stan's mind. Something about this place puts Dipper on edge, like ...maybe he should step extra carefully from now on. He will carefully conjure up a candle to hold, to help light his way.]

[He eyes the gauges behind glass, and thinking vividly, how horrifying it would be if something happened to them here. As he walks by them, he gives them plenty of space, trying not to think too hard about the prospect of being so close to such important functions. Though he's technically incorporeal, he gets phantom chills and tingles under his skin. Ugh, bad, bad.]

[Let's look at the file cabinets instead. These seem less important and just as interesting. He eyes the drawers with the labels burned off, opening them to take a peek inside, frowning to find ash.]

Should have expected that.

[Here, let's take a look inside one of the less burnt looking ones.]

[Yeah, he probably should have. But at least they aren't all burnt! Most of the drawers don't even show signs of old damage, which is incredible for Stan's mindscape. Turns out a lot of things you do on automatic don't require you remembering the whys behind the hows.

Inside of the SHOPLIFTING drawer are files of things that Stan just...understands implicitly after years of practice about the art of snatching things from stores. Impossible photographs of aisles in grocery stores with different weak points circled in red. Arrows drawn toward bored-looking red-shirt employees saying NOT PAID ENOUGH TO STOP ME, and more serious ones saying THESE GUYS SUCK, CAUSE A DISTRACTION. What sort of distraction? Diagrams follow of towers of cans with points circled saying KICK HERE AND RUN, most effective places to throw down a smoke bomb, and so many more general tips and tricks about grabbing almost anything and slipping it into his pocket. There's even one paper that just says DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES STEAL FROM WITCHES with no further explanation. It's a pretty full file that Dipper could read for days if he really wanted to.]

[Ohhhh.]

[This is very informative, actually. Dipper will actually spend a little while looking through the folder. It shouldn't surprise him that Stan has such a thorough understanding of the art of shoplifting, and yet.]

[Ah, right, he's not here to pick Stan's brain about crime. This time.]

[He will put everything back the way he found it and open up another drawer. This time he finds one with a label, but the contents look burnt again. He frowns.]

[And then he gets an idea. What if he could ...restore these burnt remains? Is that something he's capable of? He's not sure, but ...he kind of wants to try. This would be helping Stan with his memory loss, right? Right, so it shouldn't hurt him....right?]

[Dipper reaches into the cabinet to carefully touch the ash.]

[That's the thing about the unconscious mind - if asked about shoplifting, Stan would have a lot of anecdotes to share and suggestions peppered with things that may or may not be true depending on any number of different factors, but what's laid out here is very logical - a blueprint for the way Stan thinks before he even has a conscious thought.

Naturally, the label is a mysterious one. It's one of only a few that aren't labeled with words, but instead odd hieroglyphics. They don't seem to be a cipher of any kind, but there's no key inside the drawer - just ashes and a few more scraps of paper with other symbols, like large X's, ancient-looking hashtags, and maybe most bizarrely, a cat that looks like it could have been drawn by Mabel?

The ashes are just ashes, dust is just dust - though now Dipper's fingers have glitter and ash on them. It doesn't seem to hurt or help. Stan's brain doesn't combust, but it also doesn't change anything.

It certainly isn't a bad thought though - maybe it's something he just has to learn how to do, or something that could be done with time. Unless, of course, Dipper has anything else he'd like to try now.]

Edited 2024-08-05 16:43 (UTC)

[The weird label is probably what catches Dipper's attention. He peeks into it and find it ...a little more whole than the other ashen drawers. there's still things that can be made out. As he moves around some of the ash, he frowns in thought at some of the images.]

[Weirdly cryptic... Does he recognize those symbols? He doesn't think they're alchemical, though they do remind him of those symbols. Hm]

[With one of the scraps on his hand that's been partially burnt, and some of the ash from the drawer he decides to give it a try. He's not really sure what he ought to do, thinking about it. Should he try to will the paper into better shape? Like he would summon a soda or alter a dream? He realizes that ...not knowing what the symbol is actually stops him from being able to do much.]

[What a crazy, but enlightening thing to realize. That his powers are hindered so utterly on his own knowledge or imagination.]

[With a frown he decides instead to commit the symbols to memory, and maybe ask Stan about it later. He'll shut the drawer and take a step back.]

[...a lot's been damaged here, but ...maybe there is something he can do about it later. All the more reason for him to figure out his powers better, he thinks. With that he feels definitely like he shouldn't stay down here. He hasn't heard his uncle heckle him in a while so ...yeah, this is probably meant to be off limits. Okay, back up the stairs we go!

[Not only is the Stan Crab at the top of the stairs pressing its eyeballs directly onto the "glass" keeping it from descending the stairs, but there are at least two Stan-bats flying around above it, trying to somehow get a better angle to watch.

It's more than just that though - once the crab skitters out of the way so Dipper can get up, Dipper will realize the entire front room of Stan's Mind Shack is bending inward toward the top of the staircase, as though the walls themselves were dying of curiosity. The bats flutter back to the shadows and the gift shop speakers sputter back to life as the walls slowly recede back to where they were before. It's like the whole room sighs with relief.]

Ś̶̨͡͝h̢͡҉e̴̴̡͘͜é̢͢͞s̨͘͟ḩ̸̕!͘ You were in there forever, kid! Ẁ́h̶͢҉́a̷̢̛͡t́͘, did you f̸̢̨̀a̵̷̷̵̢l̵̢͡͝ĺ̴͠ ͘͜͠͡i͏̧́̀ņ́͜͞?̷̢̡̀͞

[It's the only appropriate Uncle Response.]

[Oh. That's super interesting. Dipper eyes all the ...stan!structures and stan!manifestations as he comes back up. So Stan really couldn't see him down there. That's wild.]

[No wonder he was so nervous down there, yeesh.]

Please, you really should consider putting in some lower level lighting. It was so dark down there I probably got lost in your uh, morality void or something.

[Here, he'll make a terrible joke back. Let's not... talk about what was down there. Time to move on! To another door! Memories is an old favorite, lets go in that one.]

Edited 2024-08-05 23:38 (UTC)

[Stan doesn't answer directly, but he does go ahead and make every possible light turn on Dipper, including a big spotlight that seems to be coming from absolutely nowhere. Every step Dipper takes is punctuated by a new bright light on him, at least until he gets to the hall of memories where Stan finally cuts it out.

Just like the first time around, there are a lot of rooms. Closer to the front are more recent short term memory halls, from Deerington and Deer Country. There are designated halls for Dipper and Mabel respectively, Ford, and even Soos.

Unlike in his unconscious mind, where pieces destroyed by the memory gun are no longer burning, some doors are still engulfed in blue flames. They're more contained than they were though, with no danger of spreading to anything else. They're just...forever on fire. The Deerington and Deer Country ones are mostly unscathed, and even the bulk of his recent Gravity Falls memories are fine, but the further back Dipper goes, the more fires there will be. It isn't the majority anymore, not by a long shot, but it's still probably concerning.

Stan knows this though, so a door opens up within a foot of Dipper. Inside, Stan is leaning against a mini-golf club at the Ye Royal Discount Putt Hutt back in Gravity Falls.]

Ah, don't worry about it, kid!

[Then that door slams shut, and another opens, of the kids shining a flashlight on Stan in a dark room full of cursed wax weirdos.]

It's just me! Your Grunkle Stan!

[Sure, having some memories still up in flames doesn't look great, but this is what he's got to work with now and the last thing he wants is Dipper worrying about it more than he has to.

That door slams shut too, leaving Dipper seemingly alone. So then - where to?]

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